Beautiful hurt

Well I’m up so I may as well write. I tried so hard to go to sleep oh well. My mind is racing all over the place for whatever reason. It’s woke. I just realized my ex and I were together for 5 months and broke up on the 6th. I agreed to a friendship with him after our breakup. So this is a real first for me. Once the relationship is over. It’s over.

BREAKUP

I’ll start with telling y’all how beautiful the breakup was. I can’t tell you how amazing it feels to not be dragged through the mud as a man is on his way out of your life. Just hurting you all over because he’s hurting dealing with repressed issues he should’ve dealt with years ago. Let me elaborate.

He opens my car door even when nobody else is around um hello how you doing integrity! I date solely off a man’s character. Learned that a very long time ago. I’m still in awe of this King’s character. He’s completely transparent with me consistently. I had no idea how sexy transparency could be but now that I know, I’ll never settle for anything less than. I really could go on and on about him but I’d rather talk about how I dived in head first for the experience of being with someone that sees the world as I do. Eyes like mine. My goodness the memories. I was already truly woke but we experienced a whole other awakening together. He aligned my chakras and I aligned his. He has been teaching me so many things nonstop. I’ve been a real life sponge. We talk about our magical powers and that’s one of my favorite parts. Melaninated strength.

CLOSURE

Closure. It’s an important thing to receive. Some people have sex to gain closure like one last time and some people never get it. They don’t want it so they stay bitter instead and grow resentment hold grudges maybe seek vengeance. And Then there are those that seek it on their own. It doesn’t take 2 all that is needed is you. You can get your own closure. So it literally just came to me 2 days after our breakup bc I spent the first 2 crying and dealing with the aftermath.

This experience was amazing and eyeopening to say the least. We created so many beautiful memories. Like he didn’t traumatize me at all. This was my first trauma free relationship ever! He didn’t hit any triggers. He didn’t wake up my anxiety. He really was just a breath of fresh air. He didn’t hurt me is really what I’m realizing. When I tell you about a beautiful breakup I’m saying there’s so much beauty that can come from pain.

Passions and purpose even more ignited than before. My goals are in order and I’m even more focused than I already was. He did that. He lifted so many of my insecurities when it comes to venturing into unknown territory like crypto currency and trades. Entrepreneurship is the move.

He has inspired me so much just by watching him work on his own time! I realized that ultimate freedom is what life holds. He showed me that up close and personal. I’m trying to be a runaway slave from society like him and so many others. He lit a fire so bright inside of me and I’m ready to make all the moves I’ve ever dreamed of making.

Find the beauty beneath the pain. Find your blessing in every experience. Sure I’ll be your friend after all the wonderful things that came from our relationship. We were friends first so just pick up where we left off like rewinding a movie to your favorite part and watching it from your favorite part. Skip everything in between because it’s not the focus it’s not the big picture. The focus is the beginning the end the symbolism the details that make the movie all that it is. I really love our movie and I can’t imagine changing a thing about it. My favorite part was how he dropped his life for me and came to Hawaii for me because it’s a drastic move for love that I’d make myself. Probably the most important that anyone has ever made me feel.

I’ll always be a sucker for love and a hopeless romantic. If everyone would choose love I don’t think the world would be in so much pain. I choose love above all. I’ve never felt a hurt so good. Emotions are beautiful and they aren’t life or death. Live a little and with no regrets because everyday is just adding more experience. Always look at the big picture. Live action is best.

And I said to him this and oh that’s his response to me. Live. action. real.

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